Thursday, December 22, 2005

for incomplete souls

Leah hates the Jay Leno face. She calls and says, “I’m sick of looking at that thing for the past two weeks.”

I’m a delinquent blogger. Life’s been too tiresome to have to put forth energy into creating something witty out of my misery. Finals. The bane of a student’s existence.

Anyway, I just dragged my tired self home to Philly and am about to roll into bed, but I will leave you with a few things that fell out of my mouth this week…Sometimes I startle myself. Leah, my love, if you get bored, play a game of seeing if you can guess what context they were in.

“Frontal Wedgies.”

“So, do you think those guys were gay or just Japanese?”

“Wait, you hook up with girls but don’t like masturbating?...What do you mean 'why don't I get it?' It's like an IQ test. When you look at the results, you want the scores to all hang together a certain way in order to make sense.”

“I know I’ve said this before, but I’m never buying Target underwear again.” This one’s easy if you figured out #1.

“Excuse me. Do you have that book entitled, Orgasms!? Oh no, not that one. This one had pictures…excuse me? I can’t hear you when you whisper like that.”

“Hey mister. Oh, I’m sorry Ma’am.”

“I think I caught some stomach virus. I lost my appetite for two days. Except for the nausea and cramping, it’s a pretty good way to diet.”

But this was the best - "Remember that time we picked up those French guys?...No, not that time. They were Italian...No, a different time...NO! These guys were French Canadian." Ouch. She replied, "Ooh - you always know it's a bad sign when you have to go through so many possibilities to that one question." There was a time when life didn't revolve around sleeping and studying.

2 Comments:

Blogger Jim Buggz said...

Happy holidays, from another delinquent blogger ;P

10:02 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL! Jay Leno could use a few of these.

1:04 PM  

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